The anatomy of goal setting
Started a goal in January and lost it by February? You’re in good company. A goal has a few parts, and once you know them, you can build one that lasts.
Change comes in stages
James Prochaska and Carlo DiClemente mapped the stages by studying 872 people giving up smoking on their own, back in 1983. Their later work showed that most of us go round the stages more than once.
You can stay in contemplation for a long time. Prochaska and DiClemente followed 200 smokers who were thinking about quitting, and many were still thinking about it two years later.
Thinking it over is useful. It’s where you weigh up what the change will cost you and what it’ll give you. Then have a go, even if you’re not sure yet. If it doesn’t work out, you’ll learn something for next time.
If you’ve slipped before, that’s part of the cycle too. Most of the smokers who slipped went back to thinking and planning, and started again from there.
Part 2: the whyHow to find your why
The first reason you give for a goal is usually the easy one. Keep asking why until you get to the real one.
Stop when you get to something you can picture, like keeping up with your kids in the park.
It works on any goal. I want to start a business.
Why? To make more money.
Why? So I’m not stuck in a job that owns my week.
Why does that matter? I want to be at the school gate at 3pm.
That’s the why, and it’ll get you through a lot of dull admin.
Then make sure it’s a goal you want for yourself. If it came from a friend or a podcast, ask yourself whether it fits your life.
Check your goal against your values
Your values are the few things you won’t trade, like family or freedom. Dig into your why and you’ll hit one of them. Being at the school gate at 3pm comes down to family.
To find yours, do the values exercise in our workspace. You pick from sixty-one values and cut them down to three. Letting some go stings a bit! There’s more on picking your three in our values post.
Once you’ve got your three, put your goal next to them. If it pulls against one of them, change the plan. A runner who values family might run while the kids are at football.
Part 3: who you’re becomingWhat kind of person achieves your goal?
What kind of person do you think starts a business, for instance? Are you that person?
It’s worth asking, because we act like the person we think we are. There’s a big difference between going for a run and being a runner. A run is easy to skip when you’re tired. Getting out the door is easier once you think of yourself as a runner.
You can start before you feel like one. James Clear puts it like this in Atomic Habits: Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.
Next time someone asks how the running’s going, tell them you’re a runner. It’ll feel a bit cheeky at first!
Part 4: the whatWhat are you going for?
Make it specific, so you’ll be able to check it. Get fitter
becomes run 5k without stopping by June
. Start a business
becomes ten paying customers by March
.
Then make it something you’re starting.
A goal about stopping keeps the crisps in your head all day. Ask yourself what you’re going for. Maybe it’s energy for the school run, or feeling good in your jeans.
Going for something works better. Martin Oscarsson and his colleagues in Sweden followed 1,066 people’s New Year’s resolutions for a year. 59% of the people going for something kept it up, against 47% of the people trying to stop something.
Part 5: the visionHow to picture it
Once you know what you’re going for, you can picture it. There are a few ways to do that.
Make a vision board. Pick nine pictures, write a few lines of your own and keep it in the book you open every day. Our vision board guide goes through it.
Listen to a guided visualisation. This free one from Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center takes under eight minutes. Justin Michael Williams talks you through picturing your best possible self.
Or close your eyes for a minute. Picture the day you get there. What can you see? How do you feel? What can you hear? Who’s there with you?
Part 6: WOOPPlan for what gets in the way
Picturing it feels great.
Every goal hits a few bumps, so take the time to think them through before you start. WOOP breaks that into four steps: your Wish, the best Outcome, the Obstacle and your Plan. Your wish is what you’re going for, and the outcome is the picture you just made.
Then look at the obstacle. The excuses start queuing up the minute you set a goal.
No time. Look at last week and find twenty minutes that went somewhere you can’t remember. The screen time report on your phone is a good place to start. A twenty minute walk is plenty.
After Christmas. There’s always something coming up, like the holidays or a busy month at work. Start a smaller version now.
Not my type. Try it once before you decide.
Tried before. Good! You know where it went wrong last time, so plan for that bit.
Then write your plan as an if-then:
Count what you’ve done
The middle weeks are quiet. The start is behind you and the finish line is a long way off.
Write your progress down somewhere you’ll see it, and count your head start. Two walks last week are two stamps on your card.
A head start helps people finish. Joseph Nunes and Xavier Drèze tested it with two loyalty cards at a car wash:
About a third of the people with two free stamps filled their card, against about a fifth with the plain one.
Expect it to take longer than you planned, too. Roger Buehler, Dale Griffin and Michael Ross asked students how long their thesis would take, and how long if everything went badly.
Your website will take longer than a weekend, and your first ten customers will take longer than a month. Give everything half as long again as you think. Then a slow week still leaves you on track.
Part 8: the slipWhen you miss a day
Say you’ve walked every morning for two weeks. Then on Wednesday the kids are sick, work runs late and the walk doesn’t happen. By Thursday it feels like the whole thing’s gone, so why bother?
Missing one day makes no real difference to a habit. Phillippa Lally found that when she followed 96 people building a new habit at University College London.
Walk on Thursday. James Clear’s rule is never miss twice
.
Your checklist
- Give yourself time to think it through, then make a plan.
- Keep asking why until you get to something you can picture.
- Check your goal against your values.
- Ask what kind of person achieves your goal, and start doing what they do.
- Make it specific, and make it something you’re going for.
- Picture it with a vision board, a guided visualisation or a quiet minute.
- Name what could stop you, and write an if-then for it.
- Count what you’ve done, and give it half as long again.
- Miss a day? Get back to it the next day.
Next up: your system
That’s your goal sorted! Now it needs a system: the small things you do every day, even on the days you forget about the goal. Your system is what keeps you going past February. Our next post is on how to build one.
Until then, run your goal through WOOP below.
Questions
What are the stages of change?
James Prochaska and Carlo DiClemente named five: precontemplation, contemplation, preparation, action and maintenance. Most people slip back at least once and go round again, usually from thinking and planning rather than from the very start.
Should a goal be about starting something or stopping something?
Starting something. People who set their New Year’s resolution as something to go for kept it more often than people trying to stop something, when Martin Oscarsson’s team followed them for a year.
How do you visualise a goal?
Make a vision board, listen to a short guided visualisation, or close your eyes for a minute and picture the day you get there: what you can see, how you feel, what you can hear and who’s there with you.
What should I do if I miss a day?
Pick it up again the next morning. A habit you’re building can take one missed day.